“The Pleasure Centre of the Vulva” by Louise Hill @junkshopvenus
No, it’s not a description of the backseat of a Swedish car. Half the population has one, many spend their lives searching for one and sex would be less fun without one. So let’s not beat about the bush, and get down to the nub, or the bean, or the little bald man in a boat…aka the clitoris.
Spritz your clit! Have you tried it yet?
Whatever your pet name is, we’re all aware of the clitoris. It’s the female sex organ that contains over 8000 sensory nerve endings (that’s twice as many as a penis) and its sole purpose/function is to provide pleasure… that’s pretty unique eh? It’s always been at our fingertips, but it can sometimes be Mary Quite Contrary – for some it carries enough electric pleasure to power Blackpool illuminations, but for others it may be as arousing as pressing a zit. Whether you want to start a fire or fan the flames of your dampened desire, The Tonic have created a product that will put spark in your tinder box. Plus it’s hotter and more fragrant than Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina-scented candle.
Right now, approximately 13 million women in the U.K are either peri or post menopausal. That’s a lot of sweaty, grumpy, tired, confused women, women who are experiencing all sorts of physical and mental changes and could do with a bit of respite from feeling like they’re going mad … If you’re nodding your head in recognition at that, fear not, I am one of those crazy ladies and I know exactly what you need.
The Tonic’s 8% – our #1 best selling CBD oil
If you’re reading this then you may already be aware of The Tonic Tribe’s CBD products. The 8% CBD Oil is already helping me and other women with menopausal symptoms like mood swings, night sweats and discomfort. But what about dryness? Before menopause around 17% of women aged 18-50 experience problems with vaginal dryness during sex. Post menopause it’s around 58%, so if your vajazzle has lost its dazzle, if your vajayjay’s gone cray-cray, or if there’s no more magic hiding up your wizards sleeve, it’s time to read what’s on everyone’s lips – CBD Clit Spritz…
CBD Clit Spritz is designed to help with many menopausal symptoms such as vaginal dryness and loss of sensation and here’s how;
The Tonic’s CBD Clit Spritz – available now £29.99 for 30ml from thetonictribe.com
It stimulates: The cannabis plant naturally produces terpenes, which carry their own therapeutic properties. Some of these terpenes are also found in tea tree oil, eucalyptus and mint, and it’s these stimulating terpenes that we have added in abundance to our spritz, to increase blood flow to the area, awakening the clitoris.
It lubricates: Our organic grapeseed oil acts as the carrying oil for the CBD and terpenes as well as being a silky, light and natural lubricant. It’s not greasy like other oils and your sensitive and delicate skin will be grateful for its moisturising and soothing properties.
It rejuvenates: The potent terpenes radiate the most wonderful herbal scents, with natural tones of fresh mint and zesty citrus. You’ll feel fresh and fruity in all manners of ways!
Do you want it now?
You know that you want it and how
Make yourself whole, body and soul
Be a pure new pleasure seeker
(thanks for the inspiring words Moloko)
Read my lips…The Tonic cbd Clit Spritz …there ain’t nothing finer than a spritzy vagina!
And that, ladies, is what you call a happy ending
This blog was written by our guest writer, tribe-member, peri-menopausal sweat-monger, lover of 1, mother of 3, creative genius, toy caravan collector and curator of all things filth, Louise Hill. Follow her on instagram @junkshopvenus